Just Write Something Damnit! — Day 38

This entry is part 31 of 32 in the series Just Write Something Damnit!

Author’s Note: If you have not read the first post in this series then all the rest will make no sense at all. Please click here to take a quick look at Just Write Something Damnit! — Day 1

Remington Standard Typewriter on desk with blank page I want you to be uncomfortable with yourself…to writhe in your own skin.   Life has been trying to make you feel that way since the beginning and you have resisted. You have stonewalled at every step. You have fought for your normalcy and average standing. Every time strange or unusual or out of the ordinary pops up you fuck it back into the darkness with time-honored tradition and the way of the world.   Stop.   Think.   Act.   …like the blessed soul you are   …like the unique piece of the ultimate puzzle that you are   …like the king or queen, not the pawn   Stop, think and act like you give more than no fucks about this amazing existence we are a part of. Do something strange or unusual or out of the ordinary. Do something to bring light to the world.
Just Write Something Damnit! — Day 36

Just Write Something Damnit! — Day 36

This entry is part 29 of 32 in the series Just Write Something Damnit!

Author’s Note: If you have not read the first post in this series then all the rest will make no sense at all. Please click here to take a quick look at Just Write Something Damnit! — Day 1

Remington Standard Typewriter on desk with blank page

Dead Inside

There have been times in my life that I have considered myself to be dead inside. I have been to funerals of loved ones that elicited the same emotional reaction as classes I attended in college—it wasn’t bad or good…just was.

There have also been times when the slightest emotional stimulus ripped me open wide. I could be watching a tender moment in a sitcom and suddenly find my face soaked with tears.

Results of my Mania?

I assume these two opposites to be results of my mania. The strange thing is that when I look back at these examples, and my state of mind at the time, I recall being happy overall in both instances. When I look back at times that my emotional reactions were ‘appropriate’ those moments all seem to be framed in times of great sadness. Does that mean that my emotional baseline—the conditions under which I react the most socially ‘appropriate’—is sadness? That’s a sad thought.

Just Write Something Damnit! — Day 36

Just Write Something Damnit! — Day 16

Author’s Note: If you have not read the first post in this series then all the rest will make no sense at all. Please click here to take a quick look at Just Write Something Damnit! — Day 1

Remington Standard Typewriter on desk with blank page

When a song is stuck in your head who’s voice is singing?

Go ahead.

I’ll wait.

I honestly believe that I used to hear the voice of whoever was singing the song. Now that I have thought about this question though I cannot — for the life of me — hear any other voice than my own.

Born In The USA? It’s me.

Hotel California? Me again.

Material Girl? Me for fuck’s sake! How is that even possible?

What’s even crazier? I am always perfectly in tune. To be clear, In reality, I have a better chance of carrying the Empire State Building than I do of carrying a tune. But in my head all the notes are perfect. I can even switch it up and improvise without missing a beat?

Maybe this is not strange to you at all. Maybe I am the strange one for wondering. Either way, I need to know…let me know your thoughts in the comments below.

Just Write Something Damnit! — Day 36

Just Write Something Damnit! — Day 10

This entry is part 8 of 32 in the series Just Write Something Damnit!

Author’s Note: If you have not read the first post in this series then all the rest will make no sense at all. Please click here to take a quick look at Just Write Something Damnit! — Day 1

Remington Standard Typewriter on desk with blank page

Last Night

Last Night I went to Walmart. I needed to load some money onto a prepaid card so I walked in and went directly to ‘services’. I’ve made hundreds of trips to this particular Walmart. The only thing different was that this was the first time I’d done so since the mass murder at the Walmart in El Paso.


Empty Headed

It was the end of a long day and my mind was pretty vacant. Thoughts bounced aimlessly around my head as I stood to wait my turn in line. The ‘services’ desk is right next to the main entrance so I was mindlessly people watching while I waited. Men and women, young and old, came and went through the sliding doors.


A middle-aged man walked in. He looked a little lost and stopped about five feet inside the door to look around. If I were to describe him in one word it would be ‘unkempt’. He was scruffy, looked like he’d had a much rougher day than me, and had something tucked under his right arm that I could not quite make out.


Mind On Fire

My mind jolted and my eyes danced around the space surrounding me. The following were my immediate thoughts:


The mother and her two children in front of me don’t see this guy at all. Tell them to run behind the counter and try to crawl into the storage room from there to hide. Tell the cashier to get down and tackle the older woman on her phone into the corner so her and I are out of the way. Then wait until his back is to you and throw one of the bikes that are sitting there to be returned at his head…


As these absurdities raced through my mind the man at the door turned towards a woman he seemed to recognize and started laughing. He took the oblong purse he had underneath his right arm and held it out to her. She hugged him, kissed him on the cheek, and said ‘thank you’ as he smiled and turned to walk out the door.


I snapped out of my delusion just as quickly as I had fallen into it. I felt like a fool. I also felt angry because, at that moment, I recognized the truth of the world we now live in; public safety is dead and those absurd thoughts need to be racing around all of our heads when we are out and about.

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